Letting Fear Run Your Life

FEAR (noun): an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

Merriam Webster Dictionary

Ok, ok, hear me out: FEAR IS NOT BAD. In fact, I think that when you become aware of the things that you fear, you become immensely powerful. I'm assuming we are all pretty familiar with fear. There's two main types: when you are in danger and when your mind makes up that often ends up holding us back.

Hold up, I just contradicted myself by saying that fear is not bad but it also holds us back? Let me explain...

If you let fear control your life, it will control you and hold you back from the infinite potential you have. But how can you use it as a tool? A tool to live a more vibrant, in alignment, and EASY life.

Fear tells you where you need to put your energy. I'm talking about that feeling before you start your blog, or taking time off to travel, or telling your best friend you're actually in love with them (like every cheesy romcom, right??). If you're constantly thinking about something and that thing scares the hell out of you, 9 times out of 10, you need to run towards what is scaring you.

I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.

Nelson Mandela

Fear leads us to places that'll help us grow. If you live your entire life trying to avoid being fearful, you are playing small. Some people are content with playing small. I get bored too easily so that's already off the table for me. For me, fear often follows the unknown. It expresses itself just before I am embarking on something that I won't know the outcome.

Fear protects me from getting hurt, failing, putting myself in discomfort so it makes sense that it comes with ambiguity but I don't let it stop me–it pushes me forward.

Fear vs. Intuition

Knowing fear versus your intuition telling you something is off is something that I don't think one blog post will be able to fully articulate but as your intuition strengthens, your ability to distinguish the two will become easier.

For me when I am trying to figure out if something is off or if fear is trying to hold me back,

Fear feels like a cage holding me back. It feels like my mind trying to talk me into or out of doing something. Like questioning my initial decision because of external sources or internal shame/past experiences.

Intuition telling me something is off feels like a gut "no, this is not it." For me, my intuition is always a hard no or yes–no room for second-guessing. It happens in a split second and feels like this nagging voice in my head with no explanation.

If you are having trouble distinguishing the two, no worries. I will talk more about strengthening your intuition in the coming weeks.

Like last week's post about shame, use fear as a jumping-off point. When you begin to doubt yourself or feel it coming up around a situation or recent decisions you made, etc. sit down with yourself and ask: are you afraid of the unknown? of failure? or rejection? Ask yourself, what's the worst that can happen?

I hope this resonates with you and it gets you a little bit closer to alignment.